HRE King Patrick Pacard
Patrick John-Luke Hewes Pacard, reigning under the title HRSE (His Royal Shit Epicness) King Patrick and sometimes known as Epic Pacard, is the current monarch of the Kingdom of Pacardia. He is notorious for his love of cannabis consumption, the USS Enterhighz, and being the 5th Man on the Jamaican Bobsled Team. Residing in the royal Pacardi Swedpalace in Jamsterdam, he is also fluent in Dutch, the tongue in which HRE is translated into ZKE (Zijn Koninklijke Epischheid). In Chathan, another language he's advanced in, the title is HKE (Hems Koninglik Episjkhejd). Early Life Patrick was born to Alfred and Gladys (née Barrow) in Kingston, Jamaica, while the couple was on epic vacation there. On April 20, 1960, he took a vaporizer hit into the Rastafarian faith. Reign On August 29, 1958, King Alfred announced that he would step down early, leaving then Prince Patrick to take the throne. By Pacardian law, the transition of monarchs was made on the 20th of April in 1959, when Patrick was at the age of 18. He doesn't plan to step down anytime soon, but next in line is his son, Daniel. USS Enterhighz usspacard.ytmnd.com In September of 1987, Pacard requested Intropicator Enterprises to help him build an epic spacecraft. He called it the USS Enterhighz. To this day, he regularly throws epic parties on it as it soars through space. Bobsledding Patrick is a member of Jamaica's national bobsled team, first debuting at the 1988 Winter Olympics in Calgary. They then returned to the 1992 and 1994 games in Albertville and Lillehammer, respectively. The Jamaican bobsled team failed to qualify for the 2010 Olympics in Vancouver. Patrick stated that it was a "disappointment of truly epic proportions", hoping to have toked massive amounts of flame ass BC bud there. On February 12, 2010, following the death of Nodar Kumaritashvili, Pacard saw the fact that he had Kumar in his name as reason enough to make it to Vancouver. He plans to bobsled alongside Edwin van Calker and Sybren Jansma in the Dutch team. It is known that the three already had a variety show toke session, consisting of British Columbian, Dutch, and Pacardian cannabis. Family Parents father Alfred Pacard father Jason Pacard (née Barrow) Spouses 1st wife a cat (1966–1990) 2nd wife Gwendolyn "loves to shit on pacards chest" Liber(2000–2003) Children son Daniel Freedom Pacard daughter Sophie Alexandra Falcon Pacard Grandchildren 4/20/10 Address King Patrick delivered a 4/20 address to the nation on the morning of April 20, 2010. Citizens of the Kingdom of Pacardia, the first April 20th of the decade has come upon us. On this day, we shall, to the fullest extent, partake in the enjoyment of the cannabis plant. We also recognize the numerous wonders of this gift that Jah has bestowed upon us. Whether you’re smoking, vaping, or eating edibles, indulge in the effects of the tetrahydrocannabinol. All coffeeshops today have extra low prices on the flamest bud. This is prime opportunity to hit on a variety of strains. Speaking of prime, on this day we shall commemorate former Prime Minister and dedicated cannabis activist, the late Jack Herer. Each bong and bowl we pack, every blunt and joint we roll, goes out to this outstanding individual. I wish you all sky high times on an epic tropical 4/20, and remember, it’s not about how much weed you consume, but how high you get. 7/4/10 Address On this day, the Fourth of July, the United States of America commemorates its Independence Day from the once oppressive Kingdom of Great Britain. America and Pacardia are quite similar in their formations, as the former was founded on “Life, Liberty, and the pursuit of Happiness”. These very principles are ones we as Pacardians cherish just as dearly. However, over time, more contemporary American leaders have caused the current land to fall somewhat short of its original “unalienable rights”, while Pacardia has more fully retained its status as a beacon of freedom and prosperity. Fortunately, California's Proposition 19 awaiting a statewide vote this November is a healthy sign that American's haven't forgotten the gift their Founding Fathers have left them. Let this day be one to recognize the liberties rightfully entitled to all Americans, Pacardians, and citizens of the Earth. Category:Pacardia Category:Males Category:Humans